Why We Need to Remember to Take Baby Steps

Would you expect a baby to be able to run a marathon?

I really hope you answered no.

Have you ever been at your desk or laid in bed at night thinking about all the things you had to get done? Picturing your to-do list can be really and truly scary.

I need to email ____ …Oh and I have to finish these assignments.. I forgot to call___… The application for ___ is due tomorrow… AHHHH !!!

This self-talk looks almost identical to the one I replay internally nearly everyday. You too?

Usually when I have these overwhelming feelings, I look for inspiration. Sometimes I find it and sometimes I don’t.

Lucky for me and those reading, this time I found exactly what I needed to hear.

I came across a TedX called “How to Achieve Your Most Ambitious Goals.” Please watch it if you haven’t already done so.

The speaker in this video has achieved unimaginable things. He forced himself into the Guinness Book of World Records for something that previously wasn’t a topic in it. He participated in the most difficult half marathon, learned how to speak German, read 50 books, hiked 33 trails in a year, and the list goes on.

This guy is super accomplished, right?

What’s his advice? Little steps.

How can you climb to the top of the mountain if you don’t take the first step?

How can you read 50 books if you don’t read the first chapter, sentence, word?

He suggests that instead of drastically changing our routines and habits that we add small changes to get there.

To learn German, he dedicated his commute time in which he usually listened to music, and switched the audio to the lessons.

What small actions can you make to bring you closer to your goals or to crossing off everything on that to-do list?

Don’t let the height of the mountain intimidate you. Take your next step and focus. Progress is still progress.

You won’t get everything done if you don’t start by getting the first thing done.

Baby steps.

What’s your Life Blueprint?

You can imagine my disbelief when my friend, who is embarking her motivational speaking career, told our friend group that she had never heard of Tony Robbins. Excuse me. What?!

When I was in high school, I discovered Pinterest. This was the beginning of my obsession with motivational quotes which translated into watching motivational videos on YouTube. I remember one of the first motivational speeches I watched on youtube; it was given by Tony Robbins. I remember watching this video and then watching all of his videos and thinking to myself that he truly had life figured out.

Fast-forward a few years and I’m listening to a podcast, called Earn Your Happy, where the hostess, Lori Harder, interviewed someone who was once one of Tony’s interns. Omg I thought. Tony Robbins!

So, the other day I was browsing YouTube jumping around between different TED Talks, and one of the suggested videos was one by Tony Robins that was titled change your life blueprint.

I swear I had seen this video before, but it still resonated with me so much. In Tony’s speech, he explains that the reason why we are unhappy with ourselves is because our vision of what our life should look like doesn’t match what it really is.

We have these ideas of what the perfect relationship is in our minds or the perfect job or our perfect body and we compare this mental vision to our reality. This disconnect makes us feel depressed, unsatisfied, and can cause great amounts of anxiety.

Is this true for you? I know in my life I create ideals of where I should be in my career, what kinds of relationships are in my life, how much money I should have, and what I should look like.

Tony’s resolution? Either change you mental blueprint of what your life should look like or change your life to meet the blueprint. Realize what blueprints in your life are unrealistic and create new ones or alter them so they can match your life.

One person Tony talked about in the speech was an athlete who wasn’t able to play anymore due to physical injuries. This athlete became depressed and hopeless. He said he would never be happy again unless he was able to play the sport again. In his blueprint, the only way he would make his family proud and support them was through playing this sport. It wasn’t until he realized that he could create a new path for himself that he was able to find happiness again. This wasn’t the one and only way he could find success in his life. It was time to create a new blueprint for himself.

Even when we try not to, we are constantly comparing ourselves whether it’s to that vision of what our life should be like or to others. In the end, this comparison rarely does anything for us unless we reflect when we catch ourselves doing it.

I want to end this post with a quote I saw this morning posted by Jhene Aiko:

So, what is your current “life blueprint” what adjustments will need to be made?

Thanks for reading.

XO,

YOUNGCOCO

Last Day of 2018

This year feels like it did not happen.

2018. The year my life changed.

Those who know me know that I am constantly changing and finding new interests mostly because I’m a naturally curious person but this year was different. I found purpose.

I don’t usually like to write about myself, but here is what happened in 2018:

– I dove deeper into my major and made great relationships with my professors

– I made new friends who continue inspire me

– I created my blog extremely spontaneously and fell in love with it

– I became genuinely happy. Yes there were ups and downs but through bad relationships and experiences I found out how to truly take care of myself

– I became closer to my sister which has been one of the greatest blessings to me

So this is the time of the year where we look back at the year, reflect, then decide on resolutions, right? I keep thinking of the habits I have already implemented and think these “resolutions” are an addition to everything I’ve already added to my life.

So, 2019… I want it to look something like this:

Focus on growth and giving

– Volunteer once a month

– Eat one vegetable a day. Sounds kind of silly I know. Some weeks go by and I’m like when’s the last time I ate a vegetable? So even if it’s just one carrot or even a piece of an avocado this is my goal.

– Read daily. Hard copy. It can be one page but I do need to read more.

– Have a solid morning routine and learn to enjoy working out in the morning. Read, journal, and exercise. I keep hearing that the most productive days are when you get the hardest thing done first.

– Cook more. I am guilty of buying the same foods every time I grocery shop and not making real food. In 2019 I want to learn new recipes and cook one proper meal a week.

– Blog weekly!

-Love more

What’s your resolution?

What’s the Greatest Thing You Can Do for Others?

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What’s the greatest thing you can do for others?

Become genuinely happy.

Here’s the secret though: becoming genuinely happy takes work. Are you willing to do it?

What habits are preventing you from becoming genuinely happy?

Here are some common habits I am familiar with and have noticed affect others’ happiness as well:

1. Being a pushover

2. Making decisions that don’t align with your goals

3. Not being true to yourself

4. Doing things only for instant gratification

5. Being selfish

Why do these habits affect us negatively? They prevent us from having genuine connections with ourselves which in turn makes it hard for us to connect with others. 

Think of a time when you truly felt good about yourself. Not just in a superficial way, but in a way that went deeper. You were excited to wake up and felt like you were in great alignment. Your conversations were not only great internally, but this alignment allowed for you to have great interactions with others. Every action and moment felt like it served a greater purpose. You felt connected to source. 

So, if you aren’t new to my blog, you know that I love to ask questions. I think asking yourself questions often is so important in understanding ourselves and why we behave in certain ways.

Here are some questions I want you to consider in figuring out how you will become genuinely happy:

How will I spend my mornings?

For me, mornings are sacred. I need time to wake up. If I don’t get this time, it affects my day and mood. The days I’m happiest are when I wake up and meditate. Don’t check my phone. Take time to pick out my outfit and plan my day. 

What will I do everyday to work toward my goals?

No matter who you are, working toward a goal is crucial in finding meaning in your everyday life. My goal is to lead a healthy lifestyle. I walk every single day. Walks are a good way for me to reflect and get in fresh air while getting steps in. I enjoy them too! What thing can you implement that will work with your schedule? Pick something you will enjoy doing and stick with it. Make it essential in your daily routine.

 What is/ will be my creative outlet?

We all need one. Is it music? Writing? Painting? Whatever it is, make sure you have a bit of it at least once a week. Do something simply for the fun of it. 

What will I do to stop myself from going back to old habits that prevent my happiness?

Figure out your triggers and check-in with yourself often. Why are you doing what you’re doing? I used to go out when I was sad or disappointed- not because I wanted to celebrate or have fun. In an attempt to escape reality, this habit only made me sadder. Now before I go out, I ask myself: why am I going out? And if it’s because I’m sad, I will decide to stay in and pamper myself. This has quick reflecting time has changed my life. Realize your own destructive behaviors, why you do them, and what you can do to change them for a healthier way of coping. 

What do you think? What makes you genuinely happy?

Thanks for reading!

XO,

YOUNGCOCO

Why You Need to Do More Story-Telling

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Okay funny story- are you ready?

I used to work at an elementary school- and boy if you don’t know what roasting is you will learn a thing or two while working there- okay that’s besides the point.

So, do you remember being in elementary school and always trying to act cooler or more mature than you were? Yes you do- don’t lie.

Anyways, in the classroom we had a book shelf filled with books that I never once saw a kid touch. Very sad, I know. One day, I decided to pull out a few of my childhood favorites and read them out loud. I just sat at a table by myself and began. No fair -warning- nothing.

At first, the kids were all snickering. “Why is ms. Coco just reading out loud randomly?” They started making jokes about the books, but then something funny happened.

Within five minutes of me reading, half of the classroom was sitting by me. They began to truly listen. No jokes- just engaged fourth and fifth graders. While the other half wasn’t gathered around, they were still listening as well and would occasionally run over to look at some pages as I told the stories.

Funny right? I think so at least. It’s because we all love a good story.

What teachers did you like the best? The ones that made connections through story-telling or the ones who just read off the bullet points and left you wondering “what’s the point”? I think it’s a pretty easy question to answer, right?

Story-telling draws people in! That’s why we love movies, hearing other people’s experiences, etc. It connects us to one another.

They also help us remember things better. I am much more likely to remember new information if it’s told in story form versus just having to memorize words and definitions.

Tell more stories! It makes people want to listen more and it makes it easier to connect with others.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk LOL.

And as always, thanks for reading!

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Own It

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There are so many things that I used to keep to myself because I was what? Afraid.

My whole school career was wasted saying nothing because I was afraid of sounding dumb. I never pursued my ideas because of fear of being judged. What is that? Sad.

I have friends who tell me excitedly about pursuing a dream. I get excited for them! We talk a few weeks later, and I ask about their pursuit. What do I hear? Every reason why it can’t happen. Why?

We let doubt and fear consume our minds. Ever share your goals with someone and they tell you every reason why it can’t happen for you? You let someone else’s fear and doubt consume your mind too! Just like that.

These thoughts sound something like-

“This industry is already oversaturated, I won’t make it.”

“It’s more work than I had thought. I just can’t”

“I don’t have enough money or resources”

etc. etc. etc.  etc.

My a**.

Here’s my advice: OWN IT.

Who are you? Own It.

What do you love? Own it.

What are your dreams? Own them.

Easier said then done right? Here’s something I want you to think about. What do you have to lose? Yourself- if you don’t own it.

Putting “Own It” into your daily practice is a conscious daily choice. For me, it has been joining groups that I was afraid of joining, asking the questions I used to be scared to ask, sharing ideas that have the potential to be rejected. Scary!!!! Omg. I have a mini heart attack almost every day.

But, you know what? The more doors you knock on, the more doors that will be opened for you. This is exactly what has been happening for me. So very worth it.

What does that mean?

No guts, no glory. You have to dare to be true to you and do what you know you need to do. Yes, you will be afraid- do it anyways.

Live your dream. No one got to where they wanted to be by being comfortable.

I saw a quote today that said “nothing changes without change”

So, what if you fail? Own it.

What if it doesn’t turn out how you wanted it to? Own it.

But what if it does?

 

I hope this post inspired you. Just Own It!!! (haha omg I feel like this sounds like a nike commercial.. well) Thanks for reading.

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On Following your Dreams

You have pages and pages of things you want to do, places you want to see, and goals you want to achieve. It’s all so exciting and awesome, but then at the end of the day, you realize you have done nothing to get there. Your words and thoughts don’t align with your actions and routine. Months pass and you realize all these things will only ever be dreams because you don’t have the time, money, resources, etc.

Does this sound like you?

Almost everyone I’ve met has been here-including myself. In conversation, you talk about your passions and all the ideas you have and at the end of it all you go home to do things that don’t align with your words what-so-ever and wonder why you are unsatisfied.

“words mean nothing when your actions contradict”

You can talk about how in-shape you want to get, how many friends you want to make, and how much money you want to in your bank account, but if you never actually do anything to get there how can anything actually happen?

I used to have a habit of saying all the things I wanted to do, but made every excuse under the sun at to why it wasn’t the right time.

What made me change this habit?

Having Role Models. I began to observe people who I wanted to become like. This is huge! Who’s success do I admire? What do they do differently than myself? How do they carry themselves? Why do I admire this person? How can I learn from this person?

– take this person for coffee

– do research on this person

– reach out to them online

What have I learned after talking to my role models? They aren’t smarter or luckier than me (like I had previously thought), they just spend their time differently. This made working towards my dreams less scary.

Remember that you are enough- you probably just don’t have enough information yet on how to get to where you want to be- that’s why learning from someone else is so important.

Whoever you want to learn from will be flattered that you are inspired by them, so don’t be nervous to reach out!

Surrounding myself with other dreamers. Similar to having role models- surround yourself with people who have similar goals and a growth mindset. These people will change your outlook on life and success, but make sure you are returning that energy back as well.

Friendship is a two-way street- be the friend you want to have.

1-Hour. It is said that it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something. If you’re not willing to dedicate AT LEAST an hour a day to get yourself closer to your goals, are you really invested in achieving them?

Alone time. I used to be so scared of being alone that I would make sure I never was. I would plan to spend time with my friends every single minute until I was ready for bed. Every activity from grocery shopping, homework, to working out- I had to have someone with me. It’s healthy to be social, but not to the point where you don’t know who you are when you’re alone.

Now, I make sure I give myself alone time to reconnect with myself, remember my goals, and plan what I will do to make sure I can get to where I want to be.

Picturing my ideal self. This past weekend, when I was talking to a close friend, she shared with me how someone she knew passed away recently. She said: “during her memorial, her friends said that she was the type of person to always follow through on her word. It made me think that I need to be more conscious of my effect on others and it made me question what kind of energy I want to project onto this world”.

What do you want to be known for? How will you put it into existence?

 

Are there any habits you have embedded in your daily routine that have helped you achieve your goals? I would love to hear them. Thanks!