What’s your Life Blueprint?

You can imagine my disbelief when my friend, who is embarking her motivational speaking career, told our friend group that she had never heard of Tony Robbins. Excuse me. What?!

When I was in high school, I discovered Pinterest. This was the beginning of my obsession with motivational quotes which translated into watching motivational videos on YouTube. I remember one of the first motivational speeches I watched on youtube; it was given by Tony Robbins. I remember watching this video and then watching all of his videos and thinking to myself that he truly had life figured out.

Fast-forward a few years and I’m listening to a podcast, called Earn Your Happy, where the hostess, Lori Harder, interviewed someone who was once one of Tony’s interns. Omg I thought. Tony Robbins!

So, the other day I was browsing YouTube jumping around between different TED Talks, and one of the suggested videos was one by Tony Robins that was titled change your life blueprint.

I swear I had seen this video before, but it still resonated with me so much. In Tony’s speech, he explains that the reason why we are unhappy with ourselves is because our vision of what our life should look like doesn’t match what it really is.

We have these ideas of what the perfect relationship is in our minds or the perfect job or our perfect body and we compare this mental vision to our reality. This disconnect makes us feel depressed, unsatisfied, and can cause great amounts of anxiety.

Is this true for you? I know in my life I create ideals of where I should be in my career, what kinds of relationships are in my life, how much money I should have, and what I should look like.

Tony’s resolution? Either change you mental blueprint of what your life should look like or change your life to meet the blueprint. Realize what blueprints in your life are unrealistic and create new ones or alter them so they can match your life.

One person Tony talked about in the speech was an athlete who wasn’t able to play anymore due to physical injuries. This athlete became depressed and hopeless. He said he would never be happy again unless he was able to play the sport again. In his blueprint, the only way he would make his family proud and support them was through playing this sport. It wasn’t until he realized that he could create a new path for himself that he was able to find happiness again. This wasn’t the one and only way he could find success in his life. It was time to create a new blueprint for himself.

Even when we try not to, we are constantly comparing ourselves whether it’s to that vision of what our life should be like or to others. In the end, this comparison rarely does anything for us unless we reflect when we catch ourselves doing it.

I want to end this post with a quote I saw this morning posted by Jhene Aiko:

So, what is your current “life blueprint” what adjustments will need to be made?

Thanks for reading.

XO,

YOUNGCOCO

Finding Deeper Meaning

Like many who come into college, I started my academic career by taking “generals”. These are classes like sociology 1001, biology 1000, and intro to psychology.

In these courses, we skim the various topics that pertain to the overall subjects- like in biology we briefly went over definitions of evolution, genetics, and cell functions. Each topic covered spanned about two weeks long. We took an exam, forgot about what we learned, and then moved onto the next subject.

While these classes gave us a chance to explore the wide range of studies available to us, they lacked an in-depth understanding of why the lessons were meaningful and didn’t give us the ability to have long conversations about what we had learned.

It’s not until 3000-level subjects when we are able to completely unpack and learn deeply a certain aspect of an overarching subject. We take more time focusing on each lesson and usually have one big project that we work on the entire semester.

What does this have to do with deeper meaning?

Have you ever gone to a social gathering and realized you are engaging in surface level conversations with people?

These conversations sound like tape recordings “how are you?” “how’s work?” “what’s new?”

After a while, these conversations drain our energy. Why is that?

We crave connection and meaning.

Social gatherings honestly suck until you get into those unique conversations that you don’t engage with in your everyday life. They excite us and make us feel like we are really getting to know the person we are talking with.

These conversations usually occur once we get more comfortable and situated in an environment.

If you are like me, you want to give everyone attention at an event. You want to say hi to everyone, but sometimes engaging with just a few people allows for more memorable conversations plus once you have a really good conversation it makes it easier to engage in more.

Not only do I enjoy depth in social settings, but I find when I work on just one or two projects during the day, I feel much more satisfied. Focusing on finishing a book or an art project instead of doing small bits of everything is much more rewarding. Trying to pack too much in our day makes for a chaotic life.

So what I’m really trying to say is that engaging with more in-depth content is so much more interesting and fulfilling. When my day has at least one deep interaction or lesson, I feel peaceful and whole. When my days are full of lots of superficial content, I feel like something is missing. In some ways, this deeper meaning is achieved by simplicity. Less can be more.

What do you think?

Diving Deeper into: Love and Kindness Meditation

Love and Kindness

In my “Curious About Guided Meditation? Here was my Experience .” blog post, I talked about how impactful the love & kindness practice portion felt- at one point it even had me in tears.

Since this day, I’ve been eager to learn more about this whole Love & Kindness Meditation thing: what it is, the benefits, and how to practice it on my own time. So here is what I’ve found-

What is LKM?

“Put most simply, Loving-Kindness Meditation (LKM) is the practice of cultivating the feeling of universal love – love for all beings, as opposed to personal or romantic love. This is typically done by directing well-wishes towards yourself and others. In Buddhism this is known as Metta, or compassion meditation.” Source here. 

Benefits:

Increases energy

Increases positive emotions & decreases negative emotions

Decreases migraines

Decreases PTSD

Activates & increase empathy

Increases compassion & social awareness

Curbs self-criticism

Better sleep habits

A calmer mind

Brightens complexion

Source 2 + Source 3

How to practice Love & Kindness Meditation in daily life

Here’s one method.

Begin by finding a quiet place, close your eyes, and begin by picturing yourself and say the following-

  1. May I be happy.
  2. May I be safe.
  3. May I be healthy, peaceful, and strong.
  4. May I give and receive appreciation today.

Once you have done this, think of someone you love. picture them in you mind’s eye, and say (in your head or out loud) the following-

  1. May you be happy.
  2. May you be safe.
  3. May you be healthy, peaceful, and strong.
  4. May you give and receive appreciation today.

Repeat this step for everyone you have ever loved, then for someone you feel neutral towards, then someone you don’t particularly like, and end this meditation with picturing the world and do the same.

More information about how to perform meditation here.

 

I hope you learned something new from this post.

This is definitely something I will be putting into practice in my daily life.

Thanks! 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

On Following your Dreams

You have pages and pages of things you want to do, places you want to see, and goals you want to achieve. It’s all so exciting and awesome, but then at the end of the day, you realize you have done nothing to get there. Your words and thoughts don’t align with your actions and routine. Months pass and you realize all these things will only ever be dreams because you don’t have the time, money, resources, etc.

Does this sound like you?

Almost everyone I’ve met has been here-including myself. In conversation, you talk about your passions and all the ideas you have and at the end of it all you go home to do things that don’t align with your words what-so-ever and wonder why you are unsatisfied.

“words mean nothing when your actions contradict”

You can talk about how in-shape you want to get, how many friends you want to make, and how much money you want to in your bank account, but if you never actually do anything to get there how can anything actually happen?

I used to have a habit of saying all the things I wanted to do, but made every excuse under the sun at to why it wasn’t the right time.

What made me change this habit?

Having Role Models. I began to observe people who I wanted to become like. This is huge! Who’s success do I admire? What do they do differently than myself? How do they carry themselves? Why do I admire this person? How can I learn from this person?

– take this person for coffee

– do research on this person

– reach out to them online

What have I learned after talking to my role models? They aren’t smarter or luckier than me (like I had previously thought), they just spend their time differently. This made working towards my dreams less scary.

Remember that you are enough- you probably just don’t have enough information yet on how to get to where you want to be- that’s why learning from someone else is so important.

Whoever you want to learn from will be flattered that you are inspired by them, so don’t be nervous to reach out!

Surrounding myself with other dreamers. Similar to having role models- surround yourself with people who have similar goals and a growth mindset. These people will change your outlook on life and success, but make sure you are returning that energy back as well.

Friendship is a two-way street- be the friend you want to have.

1-Hour. It is said that it takes 10,000 hours to perfect something. If you’re not willing to dedicate AT LEAST an hour a day to get yourself closer to your goals, are you really invested in achieving them?

Alone time. I used to be so scared of being alone that I would make sure I never was. I would plan to spend time with my friends every single minute until I was ready for bed. Every activity from grocery shopping, homework, to working out- I had to have someone with me. It’s healthy to be social, but not to the point where you don’t know who you are when you’re alone.

Now, I make sure I give myself alone time to reconnect with myself, remember my goals, and plan what I will do to make sure I can get to where I want to be.

Picturing my ideal self. This past weekend, when I was talking to a close friend, she shared with me how someone she knew passed away recently. She said: “during her memorial, her friends said that she was the type of person to always follow through on her word. It made me think that I need to be more conscious of my effect on others and it made me question what kind of energy I want to project onto this world”.

What do you want to be known for? How will you put it into existence?

 

Are there any habits you have embedded in your daily routine that have helped you achieve your goals? I would love to hear them. Thanks!

 

No gym? No problem. Here are 7 Fun Neighborhood Workouts

Stairs! Find a set of stairs and get in the zone.

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Hills! Put on your pump-up playlist on and get excited.

Live near a coffee shop? Run or bike there and get your day started early.

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Grab a basketball, tennis racket, or soccer ball and get playing. Make it fun!

Resistance bands! Find a reliable pole and enjoy the fresh air while getting your strength up.

Find a quiet spot, bring a mat, and practice some yoga.

Invite a friend to go for a walk. Gossiping and walking makes for lots of steps!