Just let it go
As most of the advice we are given, easier said than done.
Books and spiritual healers tell us the key to happiness and inner peace is to let go, but what exactly does that mean?
Let go of what is no longer serving you- that thought, belief, idea. Let go of that story you tell yourself where you are the victim.
Let go of the need for control. The more we feel the need to control a situation or another person, the more unhappy we find ourselves. The mentality is addictive and unhealthy. We do not own others. What they do is up to them as what we do is up to us.
What you do have control over is your contribution to any given space or relationship. Notice your thoughts. Question them frequently. Is this true or is this a story that is taking from my well-being?
Approach everything with a kind heart and watch your life flourish. Do it all out of love. What isn’t falling into place isn’t for a reason.
When we have the best intentions, give others the freedom to be themselves and aim to contribute to their happiness as well as our own, we become fully in alignment.
You can do it- let it go.
Heathy Habits suck. Agree? If so, these lessons may be helpful to you. In the book Healthy Habits Suck, Dr. Lee-Baggley gives us the following practices and ideas to help us maintain our healthy behaviors.
1. Healthy habits go against our human nature which is why it is hard for us to stick with them
The author, Dr. Lee-Baggley, gives the example of two people in the wild running from a bear- person #1 went for a run in the morning and person #2 slept in, who would be more likely to have the energy to outrun the bear? The person who slept in and saved their energy. Saving energy is a survival mechanism that healthy habits frequently contradict.
2. Find the value behind your goals
Why do you want to develop healthy habits? Dr. Lee-Baggley suggests you find a deeper meaning than just to become healthy or to lose weight. Try to attach values to your healthy goals such as: when I keep up with my healthy habits, I can show up for my family better or exercising everyday helps me do better at work.
3. Practice the 90% rule
When you decide your goals, ask yourself if you are 90% sure you will be able to achieve them. This rule plays on the fact that success breeds success and failure breeds failure. When we feel like we are going above the mark, it motivates us to do even better, and the opposite when we are under-performing.
4. The Arm Test
Try this: tell yourself you cannot lift up your arm while you lift up your arm. Can you do it? This practice serves as a reminder that the voice in your head isn’t always right. You don’t need to believe you can do something to keep doing it.
Dr. Lee-Baggley describes a study where two groups were asked to take on an impossible puzzle. The first group was given positive instruction “it’s okay if it takes a while, this is a difficult exam for everyone” whereas the second group was not. Although the puzzle was unsolvable, the first group worked at the puzzled for longer with a much more positive approach than group 2. Being compassionate with ourselves helps us to face more difficult problems and be less likely to give up.
What do you think of these ideas?
Thank you for reading,
It was weeks before graduation day and my social media was filled with my classmates accepting jobs that I had also applied for. What?! Jealousy began to fill along with feelings of self-doubt. What do they have that I lack? These thoughts took over, and I began to resent those who landed positions that I only dreamed of having.
Has this ever happened to you? You’ve worked hard to achieve something only to see others cross the finish line before you.
Don’t make the mistake of resenting them and feeling sorry for yourself. Be patient as your time will come.
What I learned from my disappointment was that celebrating others success only sped up the process of my own success. Let me repeat that: Celebrating other’s success speeds up your own.
Instead of holding grudges against people who have what you want, see them as inspiration that what you want is possible to achieve.
For me, changing my attitude and congratulating people on their success as well as seeking advice from them has made a world of a difference. Asking questions like: What kinds of activities where you involved with that helped you? What did you include in your cover letter/ resume? What questions did they ask in the interview? People will be more than excited to help you and if anything they will feel flattered that you asked.
One of two things will happen when you have this positive attitude: you will either land the position you’ve been asking the universe for or you will land something so much better.
Thanks for reading,
As 2019 is coming to an end, we begin to consider our resolutions for the New Year.
It’s safe to say we all would ideally love to live our “dream lives” yet life and comforting excuses have continued to get in our way.
Going into our next chapter, 2020, it’s so important to reflect on the year that just happened. What did you accomplish? How did you grow? What were some of the best times and worst times? Why? What habits did you continue or start? What are you proud of? What lessons did you learn?
Now diving into your goals for 2020, consider the following:
What’s one word you would like to be the theme for 2020? I was talking with a friend who told me her vision for the year was “french.” To her this means living in simplicity, dressing modestly and eating more mindfully.
How will your day to day life look like? If you are already dreading your approach to your goals, it’s likely that you will give up before you achieve them. Fall in love with the process. Get excited about new habits and routines. Make them fun.
Use a habit tracker. One of my best friends got me a habit tracking journal for the new year. They are amazing tools to help you notice patterns within yourself and get you motivated to stay on track. Achieving mini-goals along the way helps you achieve our bigger goals.
If your 2020 was a chapter in a book, how would it be written? What character will you play? What kinds of adventures will you go on? Who will you meet? How will you affect the other characters? How will you transform- internally as well as externally?
Thanks for reading. I hope your 2020 is all you are dreaming of and more.
Happy New Year 🥳
So you made it.
You’re in a new neighborhood, city, state, country.
Different landscapes and new faces.
You have a feeling that everyone you come across can tell that you’re an outsider.
Overthinking what you say and how you move- everyone knows you’re not from here.
What do you do?
Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable. Laugh at yourself and all of your awkwardness.
Smile at strangers.
Stop for pedestrians who’ve been waiting to cross.
Create a list of places to walk and explore.
Find places to volunteer- libraries or community events.
Try cooking a new recipe.
I’m subscribed to Abraham Hicks daily quotes and if you are not, I highly recommend them. Their quotes reveal great truths and inspire me every day.
This morning, the quote they sent said this:
“…And if you know life is supposed to be fun, you know more than almost anybody else knows.”
When’s the last time you did something purely for fun? Not out of obligation? Or if it was out of obligation, what did you do to make it fun?
Yesterday morning the newsletter they sent said something along the lines of “by having more fun, the more productive you become”
Work hard, play hard. The more we do things out of pure enjoyment, the better we are at approaching our harder tasks.
Take a break from the go, go, go. Read a book not to increase your knowledge but to laugh or feel something.
Go for a walk, not to lose weight but to hear the sounds of the birds and feel the breeze.
Draw something. Not to prove your artistic skills, but to allow your soul to express itself.
Life’s not all about achievement, and ironically by having this perspective, you will achieve more and be less likely to burn out.
“Are you really hungies or do you just feel empty inside?” My friend read out loud from a tweet on our way to brunch. We all laughed.
The tweet which was comical, yet very relatable, and it re-visited my mind today.
I think back to social occasions where I’ve felt disconnected or uncomfortable and have turned to food hoping it would somehow fill the void.
Food is such an emotional thing- a temporary fix from a stressful day, an escape from loneliness or disappointment.
I find that when I’m going about my day with intentional alignment with my goals and purpose that I am less likely to emotional eat. I’m more inclined to eat more nourishing foods.
Like many bad habits, it’s so important to realize what triggers or excuses you use that cause them to continue.
Just something to think about.. Food for thought💭