How Are You?

Advice + Inspiration, mindfulness, Mindfulness, relationships

How are you? How many times a day do you hear it? That played out script when we greet each other. The most disingenuous question you’ve ever heard.

How are you?

I’m great, fine, alright thanks for asking.

I was chatting with my friend the other day, and our conversation stuck with me. At first, we were talking about life, travel and relationships. The usual catch-up conversation we have since we only talk once every couple of months.

In the middle of the conversation my friend paused to ask me:

How are you? How is Coco?

A question that I usually find to be superficial suddenly felt deep.

She was asking how I was as doing as a being. As a whole. Not situationally but truly how I felt.

We hung up the phone and I realized I had never been asked that question outside of the beginning of a conversation. When she asked it, I felt deeply cared for. She really wanted to know.

What if we asked how are you more? Not at the beginning of conversation but once we were deeper into a conversation? It makes it a much more meaningful question.

What are your thoughts?

How are you?

XO,

Coco

What’s the Greatest Thing You Can Do for Others?

Advice + Inspiration
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What’s the greatest thing you can do for others?

Become genuinely happy.

Here’s the secret though: becoming genuinely happy takes work. Are you willing to do it?

What habits are preventing you from becoming genuinely happy?

Here are some common habits I am familiar with and have noticed affect others’ happiness as well:

1. Being a pushover

2. Making decisions that don’t align with your goals

3. Not being true to yourself

4. Doing things only for instant gratification

5. Being selfish

Why do these habits affect us negatively? They prevent us from having genuine connections with ourselves which in turn makes it hard for us to connect with others. 

Think of a time when you truly felt good about yourself. Not just in a superficial way, but in a way that went deeper. You were excited to wake up and felt like you were in great alignment. Your conversations were not only great internally, but this alignment allowed for you to have great interactions with others. Every action and moment felt like it served a greater purpose. You felt connected to source. 

So, if you aren’t new to my blog, you know that I love to ask questions. I think asking yourself questions often is so important in understanding ourselves and why we behave in certain ways.

Here are some questions I want you to consider in figuring out how you will become genuinely happy:

How will I spend my mornings?

For me, mornings are sacred. I need time to wake up. If I don’t get this time, it affects my day and mood. The days I’m happiest are when I wake up and meditate. Don’t check my phone. Take time to pick out my outfit and plan my day. 

What will I do everyday to work toward my goals?

No matter who you are, working toward a goal is crucial in finding meaning in your everyday life. My goal is to lead a healthy lifestyle. I walk every single day. Walks are a good way for me to reflect and get in fresh air while getting steps in. I enjoy them too! What thing can you implement that will work with your schedule? Pick something you will enjoy doing and stick with it. Make it essential in your daily routine.

 What is/ will be my creative outlet?

We all need one. Is it music? Writing? Painting? Whatever it is, make sure you have a bit of it at least once a week. Do something simply for the fun of it. 

What will I do to stop myself from going back to old habits that prevent my happiness?

Figure out your triggers and check-in with yourself often. Why are you doing what you’re doing? I used to go out when I was sad or disappointed- not because I wanted to celebrate or have fun. In an attempt to escape reality, this habit only made me sadder. Now before I go out, I ask myself: why am I going out? And if it’s because I’m sad, I will decide to stay in and pamper myself. This has quick reflecting time has changed my life. Realize your own destructive behaviors, why you do them, and what you can do to change them for a healthier way of coping. 

What do you think? What makes you genuinely happy?

Thanks for reading!

XO,

YOUNGCOCO

Why You Need to Do More Story-Telling

Advice + Inspiration, Uncategorized

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Okay funny story- are you ready?

I used to work at an elementary school- and boy if you don’t know what roasting is you will learn a thing or two while working there- okay that’s besides the point.

So, do you remember being in elementary school and always trying to act cooler or more mature than you were? Yes you do- don’t lie.

Anyways, in the classroom we had a book shelf filled with books that I never once saw a kid touch. Very sad, I know. One day, I decided to pull out a few of my childhood favorites and read them out loud. I just sat at a table by myself and began. No fair -warning- nothing.

At first, the kids were all snickering. “Why is ms. Coco just reading out loud randomly?” They started making jokes about the books, but then something funny happened.

Within five minutes of me reading, half of the classroom was sitting by me. They began to truly listen. No jokes- just engaged fourth and fifth graders. While the other half wasn’t gathered around, they were still listening as well and would occasionally run over to look at some pages as I told the stories.

Funny right? I think so at least. It’s because we all love a good story.

What teachers did you like the best? The ones that made connections through story-telling or the ones who just read off the bullet points and left you wondering “what’s the point”? I think it’s a pretty easy question to answer, right?

Story-telling draws people in! That’s why we love movies, hearing other people’s experiences, etc. It connects us to one another.

They also help us remember things better. I am much more likely to remember new information if it’s told in story form versus just having to memorize words and definitions.

Tell more stories! It makes people want to listen more and it makes it easier to connect with others.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk LOL.

And as always, thanks for reading!

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How Can We Feel More Connected?

Advice + Inspiration, Uncategorized

Have you ever felt disconnected?

It’s a strange feeling, isn’t it?

Disconnect can take form in a number of ways. This disconnect can be from your authentic self or a disconnect from others.

Being curios to understand how feelings of disconnect occur, I did some research and have compiled a list of potential causes for feeling disconnected and a list of ways to minimize these feelings from my own experience and from what I have read.

I believe that whatever words stand out to you in these lists may be a sign or call to action. I know while doing research that I noticed that some things resonated with me more than others.

Potential Causes

FOMO caused by social media

Not being fully present in conversation

Doing things that don’t align with your goals

Worrying about yourself instead of helping others (yes, obviously you need to take care of yourself, but our purpose on earth is finding ways to serve others)

Not spending enough alone time

Spending too much alone time

Drug use

Chemical imbalances

Potential Solutions

Physical activity

Spending time in nature

Developing mindfulness practices

Paying attention to your emotions (don’t suppress)

Make future plans (events, girls night, etc.)

Talking to a stranger

Eating whole foods

Hugging someone

Writing

Volunteering

Laughing

Playing

Giving gratitude

Playing with a pet

Having a creative outlet

Putting your phone down and taking a break

 

These lists contain causes and solutions for both personal disconnection and disconnection from others.

Again, I think whichever activities resonated with you the most is what is most telling. 

We all crave to feel connected. It’s a human need!

I hope you find love & connection in your day today. Thanks!

 

Any things you do to feel connected? I would love to hear them.