Developing a Win-Win Perspective

Mindfulness, Uncategorized

If I get the job, I win and if I don’t, I’m still winning.

What if your inner talk sounded like this?

How much happier would you be when things didn’t go your way?

The other day I had plans with a friend. We had the plans set in stone for weeks, and last minute, they canceled. I was bummed. It felt like a loss. I sat in bed thinking that my day was ruined. I sat in my misery and felt frustration fill my body. Then I paused and thought: how can I see this from a different perspective? I realized it had been weeks since I had alone time. I was going to make this a “me” day. I did all the things I had put off while being so busy entertaining friends and working. It was a win-win.

Wins can be lessons learned, a chance to do something new, a chance to appreciate an aspect of your life you take for granted.

Today decide that no matter what happens, you are winning.

Stop Passion Searching

advice, Uncategorized

Haven’t found your true passion yet? Guess what? it’s okay.

Yesterday morning I got back into my old morning routine: I didn’t press snooze, prepared food for the day and went for a long walk while listening to an inspirational podcast.

The podcast episode: “The Curiosity-Driven Life” on SuperSoul Conversations with Oprah

The episode featured the author of Eat Pray Love, Elizabeth Gilbert. Right away she tells us to stop searching for our passions. What? I thought she was crazy, but when we hear something controversial it makes us want to learn more, right?

She explained how she used to preach “follow your passion” until one day she received a Facebook message from a woman saying she didn’t have one, and that her speeches actually made her feel worse. It had never occurred to her that not everyone knew what their passion was their whole life as she had.

This challenged her view on life and people and now she has a new belief and speech;

There are hammers and there are hummingbirds.

Gilbert describes herself as being a hammer. Since kindergarten she’s known that she loves to write and has been writing ever since. Do you know people like this in your life? They have one true passion and have stuck with it since you’ve known them. I’ve always been envious of these types of people.

The other type of person she describes as being hummingbirds. I absolutely fall into this category. She said this type of person is always trying new things and exploring. She brings up her friend who has had several career paths in her life. If this is you, her advice is instead of searching for your “one true passion” just follow your curiosities. This takes the pressure off of having to stick to one thing. When we do this, we can enjoy and learn at our own free will. It’s not as serious as we have previously made it to be.

The beauty of a hummingbird

Hummingbirds cross-pollinate. As someone who has experienced and tried many things, you have the ability to take what you’ve learned in one place and apply elsewhere. Experience is wisdom.

In the podcast, Gilbert says that she is the person many people come to for counseling and advice. But she says that when she is in a rut, she calls her hummingbird friend. Her friend has lived through so much that she does not judge anyone for where they are in their life. And because she has experienced so much, she has wisdom to draw from many places to give great advice.

I really love that.

Are you a hammer or a hummingbird?

Thanks for reading.

XO,

Coco

This Advice Has Changed My Life

Advice + Inspiration, Uncategorized

About a week ago, I had a conversation with my mother. I told her that I had been feeling unfulfilled for days.

I believe we share our feelings with people for two reasons: either we just need someone to listen or we hope they will give us a perspective that might change us.

A week ago my mother said this:

“In life, we need to see things as rituals. From the moment we wake up and make our beds to the moment we shut our eyes at night. Make doing the dishes and folding your laundry a ritual even getting dressed in the morning. Make these things sacred to you.”

You know when someone says something to you and you feel sparks? This was one of those moments.

So often we get caught up in worrying about our future or beating ourselves up about the past that we forget to be in the present moment.

We resort to thinking happiness can only be found in large achievements or in the compliments we receive when really we can find it in combing our hair or taking the time to make our beds.

I believe this is why people get addicted to working out. Exercise is a great tool to help us focus. Thats why people call it “being in the zone.” That “zone” is the place where you are truly in the present.

Since you might be wondering, here’s how my life has changed since I received this piece of advice:

I’ve been much more aware and intentional. I find happiness in folding my favorite shirt or in packing my lunch for the day with foods that will nourish my body.

I’ve been less frustrated, anxious, and angry. I will be the first to admit I have terrible road range and can’t stand when people ask me to repeat myself because they didn’t hear what I said. Since I am only here right now, why would I perceive this moment as in my way or annoying when I can see it for what it is and just breathe? There is no real hurry and even if there was, our anxious mental state would not make it any better. Approach situations with a grateful heart.

I’ve added a new ritual. I exercise in the morning. It is now built in my schedule for an hour. It starts my day out with intention and brings me into a focused mindset. I pack my gym clothes the night before and plan my outfit. I lay them side by side so that when I wake up, I am ready to go and I am thankful.

I’m continuing to learn more. Oprah’s Super Soul Podcast has a series right now with Eckart Tolle who preaches about this idea of being in the moment. I highly recommend you take a listen.

Thank you for reading. Please let me know your thoughts.

XO,

YOUNGCOCO

Cinnamon Roll Cake or Coffee Cake?

Baking + Cooking, Uncategorized

What’s your favorite dessert?

If you asked me: Coffee cake. Or cookies. Or chocolate…. Okay I just like dessert.

Am I the only one who finds it funny that people consider coffee cake a breakfast food? I’m thinking because it has coffee in the name. Enough excuse for me to eat a dessert for breakfast!

So, I came across this recipe on Pinterest. I’ve been meaning to make for months: “Cinnamon Roll Cake.”

There are many variations to this recipe, but I chose the pin that had the best picture.

Initial thoughts: SO MUCH BUTTER.

Mid-creation thoughts: This recipe is actually super easy. Although the prep time said it would be 8 minutes, I ended up taking around 15, but it wasn’t labor intensive by any means.

Photos:

Cake Batter

Cake Topping

UH OH: Okay… I prepared this part of the blog before I checked on the cake in the oven. It’s a disaster. The topping is melted into the center and the sides are starting to burn. I swear I followed the recipe. I will check back in in 5 minutes.

5 minutes later: Now I know why the recipe is called cinnamon roll cake. This looks nothing like a coffee cake and most definitely like a cinnamon roll in cake form.

Picture:

Um… why does my stuff never look like the pictures?? 😭

Well, the recipe does call for me to add icing on top.. I don’t think I will though. I just wanted a coffee cake.

The taste: worth it! I came to my kitchen to sample my first piece, and half of the cake was all gone. It is gewey and cakey and cinnamon rolly. Will consider making again but only if I can give it away because I might eat the whole thing.

Have any of you tried cinnamon roll cake before? What do you think?

XO,

YOUNGCOCO

If You’re Bad at Remembering History, Read This.

Advice + Inspiration, Travel + Adventure, Uncategorized

You can teach me about the same war twenty times and a day later I will have already forgotten about it.

Does this sound like you?

Yesterday I was at the airport waiting to board when a woman across from me asked: “so where are you traveling to?” Quite honestly I wasn’t in the mood to chat. I had an early flight that morning and this was my connecting one. Regardless, I told her and we began to chat about our travels. She was around her mid 40s – early 50s. Her shortish golden hair reminded me of my grandmother’s.

After around ten minutes, the plane began to board. Turns out, I was sitting behind her. We talked about how she met her husband on a beach in Spain years ago. She described how they are still madly in love even after having three kids. Although that is nowhere near where my life is at right now, I felt as though we were very similar.

When we got off of the plane, we were going through airport security and she began to tell me about some Dutch history. Before she went any further, I had to tell her: “I’m going to be honest I love history. I think it’s fascinating.. but I never remember it. I’ve seen several castles and battle grounds in Ireland and I couldn’t tell you one fact about them.” She laughed at me. I felt a bit embarrassed. Then she said this:

“I’m bad at remembering history too!”

“Really, so how do you know all of these facts?”

“I read children’s books”

“Do they actually help?”

” Yes, because it’s more important to understand the big picture before trying to remember the small details. I read a children’s book called the history of France before I went there. My friend and I brought the book with us and matched the illustrated pictures to the things we saw while we were there.”

“Where have you been my whole life! Haha”

“Also there’s a lot of movies that can help with that too.”

Our conversation went further, but I had never thought of doing this. Children’s books have to explain things in simple terms. Only once you get something in simple terms can you dive deeper and learn more.

This advice has really and truly changed my life. Time to go buy some children’s books.

Have you tried this before?

XO,

YOUNGCOCO