Just let it go
As most of the advice we are given, easier said than done.
Books and spiritual healers tell us the key to happiness and inner peace is to let go, but what exactly does that mean?
Let go of what is no longer serving you- that thought, belief, idea. Let go of that story you tell yourself where you are the victim.
Let go of the need for control. The more we feel the need to control a situation or another person, the more unhappy we find ourselves. The mentality is addictive and unhealthy. We do not own others. What they do is up to them as what we do is up to us.
What you do have control over is your contribution to any given space or relationship. Notice your thoughts. Question them frequently. Is this true or is this a story that is taking from my well-being?
Approach everything with a kind heart and watch your life flourish. Do it all out of love. What isn’t falling into place isn’t for a reason.
When we have the best intentions, give others the freedom to be themselves and aim to contribute to their happiness as well as our own, we become fully in alignment.
You can do it- let it go.
It was weeks before graduation day and my social media was filled with my classmates accepting jobs that I had also applied for. What?! Jealousy began to fill along with feelings of self-doubt. What do they have that I lack? These thoughts took over, and I began to resent those who landed positions that I only dreamed of having.
Has this ever happened to you? You’ve worked hard to achieve something only to see others cross the finish line before you.
Don’t make the mistake of resenting them and feeling sorry for yourself. Be patient as your time will come.
What I learned from my disappointment was that celebrating others success only sped up the process of my own success. Let me repeat that: Celebrating other’s success speeds up your own.
Instead of holding grudges against people who have what you want, see them as inspiration that what you want is possible to achieve.
For me, changing my attitude and congratulating people on their success as well as seeking advice from them has made a world of a difference. Asking questions like: What kinds of activities where you involved with that helped you? What did you include in your cover letter/ resume? What questions did they ask in the interview? People will be more than excited to help you and if anything they will feel flattered that you asked.
One of two things will happen when you have this positive attitude: you will either land the position you’ve been asking the universe for or you will land something so much better.
Thanks for reading,
Browsing on YouTube, I came across a video titled “the 12 habits that changed my life”. Expecting a list of habits that changed this person’s life, I was surprised when the narrator actually confessed that there weren’t 12 habits that actually changed his life but his perspective. He had dedicated his year to 12 different 30-day challenges from taking cold showers every day to waking up at 5a.m. Everyday.
What did he learn? Habits that are life-changing are different for everyone. Waking up at 5 a.m. actually didn’t make him more productive, journaling didn’t change him as much as exercising everyday. This does not hold true for everyone. Journaling may be life-changing for you, but like medication there is not a one size fits all solution.
Applying this to my own life, working out everyday is something I used to strive to do as I saw this habit transform the life of my friends and family, however, it has never been a sustainable habit. I know I can dedicate at least 3 days a week to the gym since fitness is important to me, but I have other priorities such as volunteering and creating things that I also value and need to make time for that allow for my soul to thrive.
So what habits are life-changing for you? Don’t be taunted by people who wake up at 5 a.m. and say this has been life-changing for them. This does not mean that it will be the same for you.
Test out new habits and see what works best for you. Maybe even try a few 30-day challenges and see what sticks and makes you feel like you are not only growing but enjoying yourself in the process.
Thanks for reading,
So you made it.
You’re in a new neighborhood, city, state, country.
Different landscapes and new faces.
You have a feeling that everyone you come across can tell that you’re an outsider.
Overthinking what you say and how you move- everyone knows you’re not from here.
What do you do?
Allow yourself to feel uncomfortable. Laugh at yourself and all of your awkwardness.
Smile at strangers.
Stop for pedestrians who’ve been waiting to cross.
Create a list of places to walk and explore.
Find places to volunteer- libraries or community events.
Try cooking a new recipe.
“Are you really hungies or do you just feel empty inside?” My friend read out loud from a tweet on our way to brunch. We all laughed.
The tweet which was comical, yet very relatable, and it re-visited my mind today.
I think back to social occasions where I’ve felt disconnected or uncomfortable and have turned to food hoping it would somehow fill the void.
Food is such an emotional thing- a temporary fix from a stressful day, an escape from loneliness or disappointment.
I find that when I’m going about my day with intentional alignment with my goals and purpose that I am less likely to emotional eat. I’m more inclined to eat more nourishing foods.
Like many bad habits, it’s so important to realize what triggers or excuses you use that cause them to continue.
Just something to think about.. Food for thought💭
If I get the job, I win and if I don’t, I’m still winning.
What if your inner talk sounded like this?
How much happier would you be when things didn’t go your way?
The other day I had plans with a friend. We had the plans set in stone for weeks, and last minute, they canceled. I was bummed. It felt like a loss. I sat in bed thinking that my day was ruined. I sat in my misery and felt frustration fill my body. Then I paused and thought: how can I see this from a different perspective? I realized it had been weeks since I had alone time. I was going to make this a “me” day. I did all the things I had put off while being so busy entertaining friends and working. It was a win-win.
Wins can be lessons learned, a chance to do something new, a chance to appreciate an aspect of your life you take for granted.
Today decide that no matter what happens, you are winning.
Have you ever thought about a conversation you had with someone and wished you could take back what you had said? Why did I say that? What’s wrong with me?!
Well, we’ve all been there and let’s face it- that regret can eat us alive. We want to be the best versions of ourselves and with that comes having healthy relationships with others.
Think back to a time when you had a great interaction with someone that left you feeling so good about yourself. Likely it was because you were present in the moment and feeling like you were genuinely connected to the other person.
So how can we have more of these energizing interactions? For me, these following tools have been helpful:
Always see yourself as a contributor: Just because you are not the focus of attention in an environment, that does not mean your energy doesn’t play a part in the collective space. What kind of messages are you giving others, verbally or non-verbally? How is it making others feel?
Question yourself before and after you enter a new space: How do I want to affect others? How will I achieve this? If you want to make others feel listened to, how will you make sure you are doing that? If you want to help others feel confident, what kinds of things are coming out of your mouth?
Pause before speaking: What is the purpose of me saying what I am about to say? Is it based from my own fears or a place of genuine love? How will this potentially be received by the person I am talking to and is it worth that outcome?
The more intentional we are with what we say and do, the less likely we are to regret saying things in the spur of the moment and the more our relationships thrive.
Do you have any techniques in place that help you be more intentional when you interact with others?